Wholesome Work Drama : Life Lessons 101 !!!

“We were born different, with different talents, ambitions, dreams and goals, our History shapes us and we are all diverse in a big beautiful world that has room for all of us to flourish” … Christine Matenga

Why can’t we just let all of us flourish together?”  The million dollar question $$$

I should start by saying hello beautiful people,  it’s been a while since I’ve posted here, I missed the whole of last week, not because I didn’t have anything to post, I always have a lot to share but I just was tired and drained because a lot has been happening in my life and for the most part of last couple of weeks I was an emotional wreck, yes, I struggle a lot with controlling my emotions and not taking things personally but I mean what I was going through at work was outright personal and I just couldn’t not break down. As a human being sometimes you are just hit in the face so hard and can’t help it but just let yourself feel and release the bad energy, the short of it is that I am a crier #laughs, I cry a looooooot so to let it all out and I feel a bit better afterwards. The only good thing out of the last couple of weeks was having a friend of mine getting married, that made me excited and happy it kept me off the crying radar, for the most part, Congratulations Melody on your union , i am proud of you.

So I wrote the opening statement of this post from the deepest depths of my heart because I know that we all have a potential to reach our greatest heights and there is definitely room for all of us to achieve this. But a life lesson I have received lately, taught me that , “well some other people think otherwise, not every person that smiles at you and live with you seventy per cent of your time likes you the way you like them ,” It’s that simple. Just because you are generally a nice person, don’t ever make a mistake to think that everybody is equally as nice. That’s being naive I learnt the hard way (however another huge lesson from it all, don’t lose your niceness, you will lose yourself in the process and we still need nice people around. Eh but honestly it’s so tempting to feel blood and war in your veins and badly plot vengeance, I low-key, just low-key am so tempted, I’m just being honest #laughs, I won’t do it though, karma is a Bee you know it catches up with you one day or the other).

You must be wondering what really happened to me, well it’s not really a big deal, but coupled with other things it kind of became a biggie to me. I will try to share as much as possible using as little information as possible so that no one will be hurt here, yeah, right. So as I was sitting pretty minding my own business I received a message from management that there was a complaint that I am incompetent, inadequate and in simple words a liability rather than an asset to the company, yeah and I was bad for business. This news came from the very top meaning that the complaint had come from within the very closest yet I had not known about this, never had I been warned or such from the bottom part of the ladder which is my end.

 

That came as a shock yeah? Right I never expected it, and this meant everything bad on my side. It meant I just outright was painted black, in my mother tongue we call it “kusungirirwa pamuchinjikwa”, directly translated it means “being nailed on the cross”, and honestly this is exactly what it felt like, the pain of that you can only imagine. This meant potentially losing the respect I had earned from my seniors, my colleagues and probably myself, I mean self-doubt, its real I told you about it in my previous posts. (Just as you think you are taking off, flourishing and everything good, a hard blow comes, right in your face), I broke down. Had I not had a strong support systems we could be talking about something else right now, I don’t know what, I just know it could have been bad. This is basically the short of it, the long you won't like it. But like always we are always looking on the brighter side:

This is to growing up (wine glass raised up), outright celebration to growing up and learning lessons. For the past month( I was privileged enough to be enlightened), I have learnt a lesson or two, especially in the workplace:

·         It is what it is, a workplace and not your father’s house, nobody is family, its rude but its true. There is a certain level of understanding you can reach with your colleagues but don’t expect anything more, trust or loyalty or such related mushy thing, it’s like a school mate kind of relationship, no hard feelings but definitely no closeness or else somebody is going to get hurt at some point. Don’t get me wrong, some beautiful friendships are founded at work, but that’s not a total guarantee, know your place. Not everybody believes that there is room for all of us to flourish “together”.

·         Don’t be too nice and welcoming, keep your distance and maintain a working relationship. We usually are too friendly and open with some colleagues but before you do, ask yourself, “is it worth it?, where will this lead, real friendship or competition? Obviously don’t expect the worst, but stay woke until you get to a point where you know for sure who you are working with.

·         Although it is personal, don’t take it personally , if ever something happens, navigate through it, I am doing that, #man its frigging difficult, I’m always praying for strength, God knows I am, it’s still taking most of my strength I don’t want to lie, but when I look around me at work, I smile, low key saying “and then how much money did you get paid to see my downfall, please let’s share it because I guess I have the royalties after all, it’s my name that made you rich # low-key jumping up and down in my trampoline of feelings. I’m now enjoying it because guess what “I’M ALIVE”!!!

·         Forgiveness: it comes back again, this is key!!! I forgive you,  I legit do, for everything really. I forgive myself for being too nice, and thinking everybody is nice, man sometimes I’m just boringly naïve. Christine I forgive you even after you always do this, he nicest doesn’t count anymore, slowly learn who deserves it and who doesn’t. I don’t regret any of it, It’s a learning curve for me, I learnt a whole lot and I am grateful that I have added some more  weight to my growth. Please learn with me, I wouldn’t ever want for you to go through what I just experienced.

·         Always remember that not everybody understands that we can flourish together, so please forgive them before they even hurt you. And Revenge is not the answer no matter how you are tempted to.(I low-key  am always tempted, I don’t want to lie, but I never ever give in . Its human to err but never ever give them a chance to hurt you again , fool me once shame on you , fool me twice shame on me).

Always remember to be there for the next person, don’t ever kick them in the stomach especially when they are down, and always know that there is space for all of us to flourish especially when we were all born unique. Never be tempted to compete with someone at work, especially when they don’t know that you are in a competition with them (doesn't that qualify as cheating?), the problem is they don’t know that you are competing with them. it will turn poisonous on your side. Don’t be bitter, say it out if you have a problem with someone, you never know, you might just work it out all better, than playing snitch, TRUST ME IT BACKFIRES!!! Stay positive , I am…

And like always feel free to share your story and give tips on how you managed to deal with your kind of work politics, so we can all flourish together and learn more lessons everyday. You are all welcome ... Lots of love...kisses !!!

#strength #forgiveness #letsflourishtogether