Even if you came with a label, they were still going to misuse you!

NEWSFLASH: EVEN IF YOU CAME WITH A LABEL, THEY WERE STILL GOING TO ABUSE YOU IF THEY WANTED TO !!! (Christine Matenga)

Hey lovelies, hope you are all well, I am great, just coming to you with a little emotional stretching talk about relationships;these might be friendship, romantic, or any other kind. Just,you are welcome here, relax and enjoy!!!

Anyone who appreciates you, or who wants to do that, just does so and appreciates you just the way you are. You don’t need to have a poster on your chest written instructions of how you deserve respect, care, attention and all the good stuff, anyone who feels the need to do this, they just do it either way.

Often at times we tend to blame ourselves, maybe I wasn’t clear enough from the onset, maybe I didn’t give the right signals, or maybe I deserve the disrespect, No. It’s not you it’s them, Periodt!!!

Do you know how worthy, you are, just how worthy you are. No! I think you didn’t hear the question. I asked, “Do you know just how beautiful, important, relevant, significant, I mean a whole worthy bundle of existence? Yes You! Sometimes it just sounds like a lie, I mean I sometimes feel ugly, unattractive, dumb, and irrelevant like I just don’t deserve the front seat of the show, I need be at the backstage just hiding under the dressing table or something.

But I’m glad most of the time I am feeling confident and just great no matter how insignificant my contributions are sometimes. I’m glad I am finally mastering the art of utter self-confidence. It can be learnt and not easily so but it can definitely be learnt, trust me I have not always been articulate and confident but here I am today. 

You don’t need a label on your forehead written respect me, because even if you did have it , I bet you if they just didn’t want to give it to you they would still come disrespect the hell out of your brains. It’s just how life works. Imagine how many times you’ve seen the “do not “ sign but you just did the thing that was not allowed to be done anywhere, because you just didn’t care or just wanted to prove a point, or just badly wanted to do that thing and violated the order. Yeah, I know you have, just because the consequences were just not detrimental to you or you didn’t care.

pic credit: @KylieGlenn on Unsplash

What I am simply saying is that, until you start appreciating yourself, regardless of how the world sees you, you won’t get the accolades you deserve. I am getting at this: If a person doesn’t want to respect you no matter how hard you try to have it all written all over you, they will just trample on you anyway. Know who deserves your attention, and worth your time. It shows, if somebody treats you like an option, it really shows, they are available on their own time and you always the one putting in a 75% effort sometimes even an 85% and they don’t compromise. You know where I am getting at right? I know you do. No matter how much you care, make it obvious you are into it and available for it, if they just don’t want to give their all, they just won’t.

This is how life works: it’s a bitter truth but most of the times the person at the receiving end of being treated well by the other usually isn’t just a bad person there are a number of factors surrounding their behaviour. Sometimes it could just be this; we meet new people and are excited about the idea of being with them, friends , partners, spouses, but we don’t take time to really get to understand each other, by the time you do , you realize it was just the idea of being close that enticed you and there isn’t really a solid connection there but because you are already in it, you just stay in it. That’s where we get it wrong.

The moment the gum loses the taste and you both feel it, spit it before it starts giving you heartburn, you don’t want none of you being caught in the toxicity of this nature. So no matter how hard you try sometimes, it just isn’t worth it. Leave it before it withers you away and sucks you dry emotionally, because sometimes, well most times, no matter your efforts you just can’t stand the high temperature you are putting yourself under, and your label still says “no high temperatures”, this label is visible through how emotional you get, how compassionate of a person you are, how loving and caring you are and it shows, they know but just because it doesn’t matter to them anyway, they put you under certain pressures you just can’t handle( and its true can’t handle because you are human, don’t act all tough), and sometimes they know they are doing that.

pic credit: @Yunus on Unsplash

Regardless of your strength as a human being and good intentions and good signals you show, some people are not meant for us, they come for a reason and sometimes they teach us lessons, some good and some bad. If you are a good person and communicator, showing them the right codes to enter to access the programming of your heart and mind, they just won’t get it. So don’t blame yourself, look into it and check where the hurt comes from, because it just has to be done that way.

Humans are humans and sometimes we don’t take time to read the instructions on labels, we just use as we see fit and when it’s worn out we just throw the thing away. Know your worth and when to just walk away before you are embarrassingly disposed away, from the friendship, courtship, relationship , or whatever it is that you are having, because no matter how you shout and show your label, just we are not going to read it, because that’s what we do most of the times. We read where we want to and ignore where we just don’t, it’s not the fault of the one with the label, Not rocket Science (But it sure feels like so ) Periodt!

#staywinning #becoming #selflove