Letter Series : To the Beautiful Flower that provokes no Allergy

Just because we are reaching to the end of the year, I thought what better way to remind you of just how an amazing person you are. Just like the last post, this is to Self-Love in its deepest sense. Before you get into the New Year cultivate a culture of loving yourself before anyone else, you deserve the love you give out. Take note I have started "The Letter Series" , just in the appreciation of everything we are, want to be and we will be, so stay looking out for these, Im'a throw it your way time and again, because why not?.

                    

Self-Love helps you understand yourself better and how you deal with different situations in your life. In this regard this letter is a cue to how you are the boss of your life and how you can deal with life’s predicaments knowing that you can do anything because you are a powerful being, how about appreciating yourself from right where you are, you might not be nearly as half as you want to be, that is the point, TRUST THE PROCESS.  Let us grow together and push forward the agenda of Good Mental Health starting within ourselves…

pic credit: Christine Matenga

Dear Beautiful Flower …

I do not know where to start really, because before anything else your vibrant beauty blinds my eyes, pierces through my mind and melts my heart. I cannot imagine the artistry your Creator had in mind when He made all these shades of beauty that are so diverse and colorful in an unimaginable way. Let me start by reminding you of how much of a gold beacon of hope you are, because if I dwell too much on your beauty, you will lose plot and think that’s all there is of you, which definitely is a lie.

When I look at you I feel a hope undefined, a hope so profound it dives deep into my soul, and jumpstarts my mind. I see you going through pain and loss, heart break and tears but you drive through this life in a way that pain is familiar with you, regardless you still meet it head on. You pull through nonetheless looking forward to a new day because, there is always tomorrow and you never give up, you should never give up because you were gifted with a heart of gold, and you are the glue that holds everything together. You are a daughter, a sister, an aunt, a wife, a mother and most of all a well-crafted rare species, there is only one kind of you.

I am writing this letter especially to remind you of how worthy you are, how beautiful you are, and how deserving you are. This is directed to you, to remind you of how much your mind has a powerful force towards building the ultimate woman you want to be. Your looks do not matter, because already you were wonderfully crafted as you are standing right there you are a perfect result of a well thought and well-crafted artistry, Woman, you are a MASTERPIECE!

Let me dive deep into your diversified beauty. You come in all shades, all shades of black, all shades of white, all shapes, all heights and everything else beautiful. You don’t need to be perfect to be called beautiful, because perfection is a myth, it doesn’t exist. The next person is not more beautiful than you are because already you are uniquely you and there is only one you. Variety is a necessity and your existence brings this to light.

Dear African woman, the broad nose, the thick lips, the curly hair carries a beauty of its own kind that tells a story untold from the gifts we inherited. Embracing yourself is the gift you will leave your heirs who will tell the story of a strong beautiful beacon of hope called a woman, and it starts with you right now. You are the rare flower that flourished even when the ground drained out its potential. You are the beautiful flower that colors the garden so bright, and paints the world beautiful, and you need not forget it.

Your existence carries a significant part of human existence and your touch soothes the pain of the heart. Be reminded that the world is a better place when you understand how much goodness you were made to bring into the world. Be reminded how so much the next person needs you. Be reminded queens fix each other’s crown quietly. Be reminded you are no better than the next. Be reminded the next generation of powerful women is born by you. Be reminded no woman is an island unto self and to reach to the next level you can do it alone, but can do it better with another woman.

I stand to tell you that asking for help doesn’t portray you as weak; rather it portrays your smartness, that for something solid to be built, there is need for different hands from different angles for a daunting architecture. When you are slowly drowning in your worries and submerging in your sorrows never hesitate to call out so someone can rescue you, you are not alone. Let’s hold hands together in our diversified nature and color the world beautiful.

Love

Fellow Beautiful Flower

#queens #selflove#growthmindset

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 Christine Matenga:        Instagram : @chriss_in_it_19

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Body Odor please not today, not now not ever !!! : October Self-Care Favorites

Happy New month family, I hope October has been good to you and your mental health as much as it was dramatic and chaotic my side (story for another day), not forgetting way too hot for my liking. Well I am fully African and my melanin shows with its beautiful forever glow, no doubt about that, and its no secret I live in the Southern Hemisphere that is generally warm most of the time if not all the time, but this October was brutal people. I at one point thought my village people were about to send their goblins my way ( not to be superstitious but I mean any Zimbabwean person can confirm this, it was way too hot for my liking).  Now imagine how one's body will hate its owner in such a predicament, obviously and most probably, and this manifests through unpleasant body odors, unfortunately for everybody else's noses except for yours.

Hold that thought, I didn't say I smell or stink or such, before you even start imagining me having these unpleasant smells.Everybody has a natural human scent, but some get to be stronger than others due to many reasons including neglect, which is my point of entrance here. I got myself some favorites that made sure my confidence stayed A1, all well ,all the time. Self-confidence is a major thing, especially when you are a young woman still in the dating game you know, you don't want to smell otherwise lest you attract the things that are associated with bad smells, need I name them one by one? I guess we don't want to go down that lane do we? I digress, let me talk about this once and for all, " Please take care of yourself especially be conscious about how you smell around other people or else, you will make other people extremely uncomfortable. There is no difficult thing as telling the person next to you that they smell like a rotten egg, a dead cat or rotten fish, it is hard guys, it is really hard.

Also there is no uncomfortable feelings such as being around people that are constantly talking about showering better, bad odors and stuff, if you are not complaining about these smells or such, it is probably you who is the source of these bad odors, be warned, don't say I didn't tell you. So please pay attention to your body, because there is no thing that is crippling as not being able to move around or talk around other people simply because you are not confident if you are smelling good or otherwise. This breaks down your confidence, this diminishes your value around other people and is deadly to your mental health. So take care of yourself in that regard hey. You should, You MUST !!!

I am a very conscious being, sensitive and very emotional, I feed off other people's energies and I am a social being, in simple words I am somewhat a social vampire, so I love being around people, talking to them, listening to them as they share their views, share my own, shout and be loud and all that, so I know I in order for me to thrive I should always look and feel and smell my best. I also thrive within my own solitude and to be happy personally I always have to look and smell good a hundred. And by smelling good I don't mean smelling like Gucci or Jadore all the time cause obviously I can't afford, well just not yet. By smelling good I mean Lemon fresh Scent, Pink Diamond Avon Roll on fresh, Nivea deodorant fresh and the likes and definitely no fishy odor allowed.

So to make sure of this, I have myself a stash of self care products that I always gravitate towards so that I am always smelling and looking fresh and keep my confidence at 100% and I would like to share with you. They say if you look good, you feel good, and if you feel good, you relate better with the rest of the world, and I want to also add that this looking good should start inside of you, in your mind, reflecting through your body scent and then going outward to your garments, and then you sorted for the day.

This piece like most of them is dedicated to my fellow young women and also a reminder to the older women as well. If you a man reading this, it is equally important because I am confident you have sisters, girlfriends, wives and the likes and you also want to be a clean woman, you can always play a part in this whole cycle. So thank you, for also playing a part in gifting women in your lives with the items mentioned in this kit, Christmas is coming in a month and for some of us December babies our birthdays, 😜😉😜.

The most important thing most life changing item for me is the menstrual cup that I started using last year (2018),  after working for an organization that championed Sexual Reproductive Health for women, my period experience has never been the same again. The menstrual cup I use is from the Butterfly Cup Company and is a device made up of Silicone Grade Material that has no side effects to your precious vaginal area plus can be used for years before purchasing another. It collects blood instead of the regular absorbing that most other sanitary-ware does, helps with no odor whatsoever becomes it is inserted inside of you and keeps your blood away from oxygen, because its the oxygen that reacts with your blood that causes bad fishy odor, and this is my favorite part, since it collects blood, it reduces the number of days of your flow. 

I mean how amazing is that. No odor, less days, reusable, economic and the most comfortable device ever, you will forget you are on your menses (if you use it well). I was just as skeptic and reserved as you are with so many questions before I tried it, but trust me I am not paid to advertise it, it is life changing to your hygiene as well as mental welfare, not forgetting very friendly to your pocket dollar wise. ( Don't hesitate to hit my DM if you want to know more about this, or rather request for a full post on its own, you are welcome).

Next is my antiperspirant deodorant spray and roll on. I never go a day without this, even the night too which is when it is most useful. If you didn't know,  your antiperspirant spray or roll on, is most effective when applied after the night shower before bed, so that it prevents sweat to come attacking you in full force the next day, plus it helps with one sleeping smelling nice you know. You should not go a day without your roll on, and make sure it is an antiperspirant type, these are easily accessible in most if not all shops nearest to you. If you can't afford one, no problem you can apply bicarbonate of soda or just a regular lemon, on shaved armpits of course. Please get rid of the disgusting yellow bush under there, it is disgusting and smells bad. My favorite go to roll on is Nivea Black and White, and i recently got a brand new favorite" Pink Diamond Roll On" from Avroy Shlain South Africa. It doesn't only regulates the sweat production but also smells nice whilst at it.

The following other three have nothing to do with odor but are my self care favorites ( skin care products) currently that make me stay confident and just generally happy which is key to maintaining and keeping in check my mental health. Firstly my Safeway Body Exfoliating Brush cannot go without being mentioned. This electric Brush has really helped me with my facial skin exfoliating more than anything else and has helped with my skin care routine tremendously. I generally have very sensitive skin and I thought maybe it was going to be harsh but me just being me tried it anyway, and boy was it worth it. I don't have the fairest smoothest skin in the room but my flacky skin has improved noticeably because I use it just once in a week to get rid of the dead skin before applying my Neutrogena Oil Free Gentle Scrub, to gently further do away with the dead disgusting skin. I don't wear make up specifically foundation so I mean the skin has to glow in all its glory and these help me achieve it easily. 

And lastly to moisturize my skin I am currently using my Inuka Tissue Oil which is slightly fragranced and then my regular Aqueous Cream . I don't exactly like the fact that this Tissue Oil has a fragrance because like I mentioned I have very sensitive skin so I barely use it on my face unless if I am removing lipstick from my lips. I mostly use this for my feet, that are generally not so smooth from all the roadside ball-playing (called Raka-Raka and Hwishu for those that know these testify to all the evil we used to do to our poor feet) when I was young. My heels have not loved me at all for doing this to them, but the tissue oil has really helped with softening the skin there.

After all being said, these are just my October favorites and a few I had to mention and you can try them sometime. It is important to note that when you are taking care of your body, you are having a me-time that is well deserved and also getting to know more of what works and what doesn't for you , what more would you want? Take care of yourself, get to know what works for you and do lots of it (also keeping in mind that too much of anything is not good). Self Love is more than just telling yourself that you are beautiful and all that stuff without actually investing in and spoiling yourself. Self-Love is a whole lifestyle, a whole mood that you shouldn't take lightly, a whole mood I live for. 

N.B I didn't mention mouthwashes, toothpaste, body washes and all the little bits because I feel these are obvious, I will end up writing a book. 

Keep loving and once in a while spoiling yourself, you deserve it. Gather the things you love slowly but surely and treat yourself like a queen that you are. Before anyone else comes to treat you like one, own the title and guard your heart and life jealously.  And please, stay fresh and chase away the bad odors, Its hot we want to live in peace and freshness.

Feel free to share what works better for you and we all can learn a thing or two. Let's keep growing together!!!

#selfcare #selflove #growth